Realisations and Reflections

It is morning and I just asked myself have I done the right thing? Dragging my family through a major life change. I look at Ryan sleeping in just his brief - he has not swam in weeks and swimming was his only constant form of exercise. He was watching TV till 2:30 am and claimed he could not sleep until I coerced him into turning it off. I looked at Bert and think to myself I have disconnected us from all our families and friends - it is about 10pm in Singapore and it should have been our usual tennis followed by supper night. But it is too late to turn back.

The last two weeks have been a whirlwind of activities. The packers came to our house and in two days, most of our household stuff were packed and shipped. It was unbelievable how efficient and professional they were. The packing was beautifully done, down to creating temporary wardrobes to hang the clothes taken from the closets. Amazing. And in the midst of the packing, a Swiss family came threading through the boxes gingerly to view the house. I thought it could not have been the worst timing because it certainly showed the house at its messiest, so different from how it normally is. Yet, to my utter amazement, they liked the house and within 2 hours, they had indicated they wanted to rent it and a price was offered. Wow.

And mom lived with us through the 2 days of messiness and in the process, managed to give away to the packers 2 treasured backpacks that I wanted her to give to my nephews. They were limited edition in that there are no more of such. So like mom but she should have at least consulted me before giving my things away. My heart ached for quite a while.

And the last of the koi died. It was terribly heartbreaking. It was as if they knew we were going away (just like the bats who left soon after I got the new job) and they did not want to carry on without us. The Swiss family was fascinated by the koi and were disappointed to know they had all died. So we had to go and buy new baby ones. Bert cleaned out the pond, and the new koi were released into it.

The rest of the household stuff we finally threw away because the garang kuni men were picky - after we waited 2 days for them to show up. When you need them, they don't show up; otherwise they come around all the time with their annoying horns. So the garbage truck came and the two men were delighted. They kept all the good usable things for themselves - I supposed to sell - and the rest were crushed by the machine.

Then we moved to the service apartment to live out the remaining week in Singapore. And it was a fantastic week of almost daily tennis in Orchard ParkSuites' two tennis courts and nightly suppers. Everyone was determined to hang out and hang together as much as possible before the final farewell. An amazing circle of family and friends and an amazing experience. Thank you so much. We never felt more loved.

Contrast this with the first week in SR. Lost luggage aside, it has been a very lonely time of combing the internet for information, then driving around looking for school and a home and being very tired from jet lag all the time. And eating irregularly and living in a hotel room strewned with bags after they arrived.

But we were fortunate that Ryan was accepted into Iron Horse Middle School almost effortlessly. We went to Wells which is in Dublin because our interim housing was in Dublin. They sent us off to a new school which has just been built to combine Wells and another school. But we could not find it despite trying for 2 days. There is a lot of development going in there. My colleague, who is taking over my existing job, suggested I called Iron Horse's principal who is apparently very highly regarded. I could not get him but we decided to just drop by the school. The registrar, Val, was a fantastic lady. With her help and by calling Oakwood to give me a change of interim housing to San Ramon, we were able to get Ryan registered although Val still had to get clearance from the school counselor that he was fit for Grade 6 or we may have to find another school. The next day, Val got airtime with the counselor and yes, he is accepted. Hallelujah!

The next day, Ryan had to attend Jaguar Camp - orientation by another name - and we found out Iron Horse is the fifth highest ranked nationwide and second in the state of California. Wow again.

I went to the office on Wed for my expat briefing session with HR and the agency. And had a full day of leadership team meetings on Thursday, first with my new colleagues and almost immediately afterwards, with my existing colleagues in Marketing Solutions. So poignant in a way. And had two nights of dinner, on Wed with my existing colleagues as a farewell to Rachelle and I, and the next night, with my new colleagues, as a farewell to my predecessor and a welcome to me. The closing and opening chapters.

So this Saturday morning, we are moving into Promontory View and will begin a new chapter. I am looking forward to it. To unpacking our clothes, shopping for Ryan's school supplies and getting a semblance of order back into our lives even if it is only for the next few weeks.

Lost Luggage Litany

I have been incommunicado for some days. It has been a rough week beginning with the flight out of Singapore.

First, we had no seat assignments and no priority because the company travel agent forgot to enter my frequent flyer number into the reservation system. Then we could not get past the police officer and had to get an airline customer service officer to show the policeman we were legit travellers. Because we spent so much time with family and friends in the airport having lunch and coffee and taking pics, we were the last passengers into the departure lounge. The airline still had no seat assignments for us so the ticketing staff hastily hand wrote some on the boarding passes. On board, the seats were taken so a steward gestured for us to go upstairs but no, there were no seats up there as well. So we stood there at the staircase landing like idiots for 5 minutes while the crew tried to figure out where to seat us. Then we climbed back down and finally, Ryan and I sat together and daddy was one row ahead.

In SFO, we waited a long time at the carousel for our bags. Very unusual considering we were on business class and tagged PPS. A page for passenger so and so and the dreaded "we lost your luggage in Hong Kong" from the agent at the information counter. We think they are in Hong Kong and will come on the next CX flight which will arrive tomorrow afternoon. We will rush them to your hotel, just fill up this form for us. And what do we do for toiletries meantime? All this heightened airport security meant we carried absolute minimum with us and definitely not the banned toothpaste. Oh, in that case, if you buy toothbrushes and toothpaste, keep the receipts and claim back from the airline. And change of clothes? Oh, I guess you can buy up to $80 and claim. $80 for 3 of us? But I have to go to office!! What can I possibly get for $80 in the Bay Area? Oh were you on business class, not coach? Yes and I have premier frequent flyer status. Oh in that case, maybe up to $120 but I am not sure, I have to check with claim department - will ask them to call you tomorrow. So sorry and have a good night (sic).

Contrast this sad scenario with the next. Called the limo service and were told to wait across the road at the bus stop. Along came this white stretch limo with built in TV and bar inside for the 3 frumpy travellers. It was like totally overdone. I would have been very happy with a normal salon. And yes, a rental car was already at the hotel for us and it was a large brand new Korean gas guzzler. Rushed out to drug store close to midnight to get toothpaste and toothbrushes.

Next morning, we went school hunting for Ryan despite the initial onslaught of jet lag. Saw the apartment complex in Dublin where the company had booked our interim housing. Quite nice. Finally ended up at Iron Horse Middle School near the office where we were fortunate to be allowed to enrol Ryan but only after I called the company's appointed corporate housing agent to change our interim housing from a nice new development in Dublin to a not so fancy one bedroom apartment at Promontory View where I stayed for 5 months in 2003. I don't care, I said, I just want the address to enrol my son. And yes, a rollaway bed for the boy will be fine, he does not mind.

Airline found 4 of 5 pieces of luggage next day but mine was missing. I debated with the agent - are they really sure my luggage is in Hong Kong or have they truly lost it. .....not sure..... Oh, and the claims department never called as you promised. How much can I really spend on clothes to go to the office? I cannot go to meetings in several days' old clothes and tennis shoes that have travelled ten of thousands of miles. Let me put you to claims department. Claims officer after some haggling: Oh OK, I think I can authorise up to $150. Someone will call you tomorrow morning to let you know when your luggage will arive from Hong Kong...

Luggage finally showed up late Tuesday night. After I wrote an anguish email to company travel agent and airline because from the tones of the agents, I was half convinced they had no idea at all where my luggage really was and whether they could find it. And after the first flurry of responses from the travel agency and airline, little has ensued except for a call late at night after my luggage showed up to say, Head Office asked us to call you because you said no one called you today to update you on the status of your luggage which has been found and sent to the hotel. Please accept our apology for not calling as we had promised ... But the 3 of us did go get me a blouse and pair of pants. We shall see what contention looms ahead with the claims.

And so end the saga of my first steps into a foreign assignment. In a dazed state of mind induced by very troublesome jet lag compounded by anxiety over so many things... Yet, inspite of it all, we got a lot done. But that is a story for another blog.

Fond Farewell

Today we leave Singapore. Doris is here already at the service apartment with us and I am not sure when the others will arrive. The plan is to take the 14-seater bus provided by Orchard ParkSuites and have lunch at the airport after we have checked in. I think the 14-seater will not be able to accommodate everyone plus the luggage so someone may have to drive after all. Oops, I hear the doorbell. Yes, it is yee yee.

Carynn left on August 17. It was very late and I really really appreciate the camaraderie shown by the whole gang. By the time, we left the airport, it was around midnight. The gang, to which Doris apparently has been drafted, has spent almost every single day with us in the service apartment, playing tennis and having supper in Orchard Road till the wee hours. As Abby said so aptly, it felt like we were on holiday. All holidays unfortunately have to come to an end. And the end is nigh.

I have not kept up with the dairy because it was unbelievably busy the last couple of weeks. When I have some spare moments in California, I will try to write up the events.

Farewell Singapore and all the family and friends we have. It was not planned at all but my entire brood has somehow ended up in North America. It's destiny.

Medicals and Moving Madness

Last few days flew by. The house is starting to look like a war room now with boxes lying around, cupboards emptied and massive bags of old documents to dispose of. It is in a way kind of sad. I love this house - it has done my family and I good to move here although the initial year was pretty traumatic because it was basically emptying out what little savings and earnings I had. I had sleepless nights worrying about paying off the mortgage, the difficulty with selling off the Pandan Valley apartment for financial relief and Carynn's hefty tuition fees. It really aged me a lot that year and for some time I regretted making the move. But I was always angry or upset in Pandan Valley, maybe because of the feng shui, maybe because the apartment was so cramped or maybe because Carynn started down a slippery slope in school and at home almost all the years we were in Pandan Valley and brought us along for a really scary tiring emotional roller-coaster ride. Moving to this house was like a new lease on life and although the kids complained at first about the distance, I believe they all eventually grew into the house. It is funny that way - the Chinese belief about yuan feng or, for lack of a better equivalent in English, affinity. It just harmonizes. I lose my cool a whole lot less and the kids seem better behaved. Nicole, for example, has turned around a fair bit from never doing her homework and driving teachers up the wall to trying her level best to better her grades and Brynn did well in her "O" levels. I think we also get along better now and they are less combative and even friendly to one another. Witness all the bloggings on "I love you chae nic bean ryan everybody and anybody etc etc" (kind of yukky at times - oops, watch out for the anti-mom tirade).

We went for the medical and got the results the very next day which was yesterday. All in excellent health except dad had to have a hepatitis B jab on the spot cos he had no immunity to it. Cholesterol count a bit on borderline too. Hee hee, he would not listen when I told him to watch what he ate at least for the couple of days before the exam. Curry chicken at Singapore Swimming Club is hard to resist, I know, but just abstaining for a while is not too much to ask, is it? Doctor is an American who has been practising in Singapore for 22 years! He tried to joke with us but I think we were a little too stiff. I go for annual medicals because the company says I must but this is the first time I have gone to this clinic. It is not as well equipped or sophisticated as Asia Medic or Shenton but doc is nice enough. Surprisingly, many of the clinics on the company panel does not do medicals for American visas. Mostly Australian visas.

I don't know if we are able to finish packing up by August 11. Seems like an unending chore. Poor Melody is the one doing a lot of the work, mostly without complaining. But she sometimes does not use common sense and would just pack even things of absolutely no use like Ryan's bundle of ice-cream sticks. She was afraid initially that we would leave her behind without a job, worried about how she was going to support her family and pay the children's medical bills. But she need not have. I would never leave her stranded. So we told her we were taking care of getting her a transfer and now she looks more cheerful again. She has been a good addition to our household although I wish often that she would speak properly in a normal voice instead of the high pitch squeaks. I wish I could bring her with us but we cannot. I shall miss having her around - it has been almost 5 years since she came to us.

Today is National Day. I started the day having a concall going through applicants for my current job and selecting candidates for interviews. A chapter of my life is about to close.

Viva la Visa

Yes, we have the visas. It went without any hassle so I guess I owe the ICA officer an apology for doubting his words. He was right about the US embassy knowing the Singapore NS and passport situation and would not be difficult. Sigh!

Well, now that most paperwork is in place, guess we need to start the hard work of clearing up the mountains of things we always manage to accumulate very quickly no matter how often I throw things out each time we move. It is quite unbelievable how much like garang kuni men we are - but they at least do it for a living, we do it because we buy impulsively among other reasons and always think "we are going to need this someday, if I throw it out now, I know I will regret it". I have too many T-shirts, courtesy of company and although a tonne was already given to some relatives just last week, there is still a lot. Grungy work that really is not my cup of tea. And I don't know what to do with all the momentoes from all over. Seems so stupid to pack them, ship them and then ship them back years later. Such a waste of energy and money. May ask HR for storage in Singapore. Wonder how much it would cost company.

Movers coming on 10th and 11th. We will probably have to move to a service apartment or hotel from then till we leave on the 18th. No beds and although better half brags about how he can sleep on the hard wood floor, I am personally too stiff and brittle in my senior years for such malpractice (plus I think he really cannot because he is not as tough as he seems to think he is but don't tell him I say so). Now that the day is drawing near, I am starting to fill with doubts and would you believe it, homesickness. I am already starting to miss the people here, so silly. My sisters, my brother, my mother, my nieces and nephews, siew mun, danny, abby, david, miya, bui, doris, ...

And oh, I almost forgot we still have to go for the medical. Will be interesting to see what battles loom ahead because last couple of times when I spoke with the clinic, they insisted I must produce a letter from the embassy which will have some sort of code they need. Well I did not get any such letter, only our passports with the visas and my stack of company documents.

I started a calendar on this blog so my circle of family and friends will use it to share our events and activities. Hope it will serve its intended purpose.

BlackBerry Blog

I tried blogging after the embassy visit with my BlackBerry and I thought I was doing fine except for a few mishaps. Apparently not. The mishaps got published (and subsequently deleted) but the saved blog never showed. Oh well!

So the visa applications got processed. We had some adventures with not having the right change (must be old $10 notes, plastic notes will not do) for the photo taking at the booth in the application section and not having enough money to pay the visa fee. On top of the cashier's order which we had already prepared some days ago.

So everything went smoothly and no awkward questions asked about junior's passport. Whew! Maybe the questions will come when I go collect on Friday. Hope not. Anyway, even if the visa is given for this passport, in 2 years' time, we will have to find a way to renew both passport and visa over there.

And did I mention that the car would not start last evening? Better half and I had dinner with Doris and Bui at a Sin Ming coffeeshop. Had to leave the car in the car park overnight. After the embassy, we went to get the car workshop to bring the car for repair. Long time at the workshop but eventually got it fixed. Battery had finally caved in after 5 years of faithful service. Painful to spend this kind of money so close to selling off the car. New battery seems to have also removed some spinning noises that had been obvious for some time. Weird!

Keeping my fingers crossed for Friday. Next hurdle - medicals for all four of us after collecting the visas. Cheers!

Passport Pains

This is somewhat controversial but I have to faithfully record my expat adventure for posterity or at least for my own reflection in my old age.

So we were planning to go to get our US visas yesterday with the kids except I had the hunch I better go read the application checklist more closely to make sure I had everything in order. So it came to pass that I realised with some trepidation that both junior's passport and mine would not pass muster. Both passports expire in 2 years and we needed visas for 3 years. So at the last minute it was, "you need to go to school tomorrow cos we are not going to the embassy" and "sorry, school bus uncle, you do need to come pick up junior for school tomorrow morning because we have a change of plans."

So off to passport office we went and lo and behold, we were told policy has it we cannot extend junior's passport - there was some flip flopping around the ages but basic message was boys between 13 (or flip flop to 11) and 16 can only have passports for 2 years or we have to post a bond (ouch). And then: however, if we can wait till August 15 when new rules come into force, we will be able to get a new passport that will allow the full 5 years. But but but... I countered, I cannot wait because my plans are to arrive in the US on August 18. Policy is policy is policy says the powers that be and don't think of going to see your MP because it is not going to work. Then the sweetener - there are others in similar situations and the US embassy understands, so just go ahead and see what they say, blah blah blah.

Problem is they are not the ones who will be running from place to place, eh. There was even some alluding to maybe leaving junior behind (to my utter jaw dropping flabbergasted amazement). And the better half was to my surprise very understanding that the officers cannot bend policies so we will try, etc, etc.

And to think we only renewed junior's passport in May, barely 2 months ago. Such bad timing.

How can the passport section do this to citizens, I groused in private to my better half, flip flopping around with important things like passports in knee jerk fashion because a certain musician from London skipped his national service...

Anyway, we are going to heed the officer's advice and see if the US embassy folks are as understanding as our officer reckon they will be. Otherwise, we will have to figure out next steps.